In My Mirror

In My Mirror

Sometimes when I look in the mirror,
I see a young girl looking back at me.
That girl is me,
Or more,
Past me.
She has small eyes but a big smile.
She looks happy, peaceful,
Yet,
Weak and frail.
It looks like I could touch the mirror,
And she would break in an instant.
When I look at myself in the mirror,
I see a strong girl with big dreams.
She may not be happy yet but she will get there one day.
Then it occurred to me.
The harder things get,
The stronger you become.
And then I smile.

The Girl I Once Knew

The Girl I Once Knew

I once knew this girl who lived in the dark.
She would only leave if you played music.
The music had to be soft, peaceful,
And it had to have soul.
No one wanted her to leave the dark though.
No one visited her and no one wanted her.
She stayed in the dark for years,
Humming to herself,
Hoping to one day be free.
She sits afraid,
Cold,
Lonely,
Depressed.
One day, I tried to help her.
I chased after her for miles,
But I still remained behind her strangeness.
In the breaking of the sun, I stopped moving.
I stared at her and felt her touch.
I felt her heart melting into my own.
When I looked at her,
She stared directly backed at me.
I reached out,
And then she reached out.
It only took me so long to realize that the depression I was chasing,
Was following me all along.
Over all this time,
I realized that the girl in the dark,
Is me.
Or at least,
The me I once knew.

Hope in My Heart

Hope in My Heart

If you look up into the sky at night,
You may see stars.
Sometimes, however,
You see nothing at all.

If you look up into the sky in the day,
You may see the sun,
Sometimes, however,
You can only see clouds.

If you look into my heart,
You may see hope,
Sometimes, however,
You can only see my flaws.

No matter what though,
There will always be stars at night,
A bright sun in the day,
And believe it or not,
There is still hope in my heart.
There will always be hope in my heart.

Valentine's Day

Valentine's Day

They say that love is supposed to free you.
They say that yes, it hurts, but it is beautiful,
After all, Beauty is Pain, right?
I don't see the beauty,
Not today at least.
I walk the halls with my head pointed down low.
If I look up, I will see girls who are in love.
They hold soft stuffed bears,
Dozens of roses that could stretch for miles,
Small chocolates that make them feel accepted,
And most of all,
They are in the company of someone who loves them.
When I look up, they are starring at me.
They have pity in their eyes because they know that I am alone.
As their lips curl, I feel myself shrinking into nothing.
I try to ignore the pain, but it is crawling out of my throat.
I try to run,
To breathe,
To cry,
But it is all held inside by the beauty and pain of this love.
This deadly love.
That only, special kind of love.
The love,
Of course,
Of Valentine's Day.

I don't go home

I don't go home

When the final bell rings, students are expected to leave.
All the kids laugh and cheer with glee as they go home.
At home, they spread their wings into whatever they want it to be.
They live life without fear,
Without judgement,
Without worry.
I don't go home.
Home is where the depression hits.
Home is where I feel trapped in my own soul,
Trapped by the loneliness within.

So when the final bell rings, I stay behind.
I walk the halls with a smile on my face,
Not because I am happy but because I am more than the demons that haunt me.
I leave my wings locked away where they are safe.
If I fly, I will fall.
If I fall, I will be gone,
Gone forever.

Yet, as I type these words ever so slightly,
I am in the comfort of my own home.
I am locked away with the brain of soulful writer.
Though,
Sometimes it makes me wonder...

What if I didn't go home?